ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
