I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
