I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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