I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize