so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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