white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Randomize
