I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
