Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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