It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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