using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
