Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
you would pick up someone in the library
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
my liver is dry heaving
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
