Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
