their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
