It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
