I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
