she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
