so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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