I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
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