Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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