thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
