Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize