doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
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