whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
