Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize
