My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I take back everything I said about communal showers
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Randomize