My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
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