i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize