is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize