Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize