Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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