Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
literally had 100 drinks last night.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
