you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
