FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
