Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
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