Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
