Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
