How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
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