in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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