He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
