He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
