you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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