they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
