Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
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