He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
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