i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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