so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
