yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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