There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
