Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
