I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
