Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
either way he was missing a nipple.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
