been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
She even gives head with a lisp.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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